A Deep Dive into My Communication Style: A Personal Analysis
My communication skills (essay)
Through self-reflection and analysis in a communication skills course, I have discovered that I have an assertive communication style, which is the happy medium between being overly aggressive and too passive. This revelation has led me to write about my communication style in this essay, which delves into my journey of understanding my preferred communication style and the importance of being confident in communicating without resorting to game-playing or manipulation. The exercises and self-analysis assignments throughout the course have confirmed my perception of myself as an assertive communicator, and I am now aware of my limits and don't allow myself to be pushed beyond them just because someone else demands something from me.
However, over time and with much practice, I have learned how to communicate effectively by adopting an assertive stance. As stated previously, assertiveness comes from a belief in one’s self. While this is accurate of myself, I also believe that others are valuable as well. I consider myself an effective and active listener. I try to set clear limits and expectations and avoid using labels or judgments. In the workplace, I acknowledge what needs to be done and develop a plan to accomplish it. When it comes to conflict and problem solving, I openly negotiate and compromise. I confront problems at the time they happen to avoid letting negative feelings build up. I believe assertive communication is the style to strive for. In that case, I don’t focus on the other styles as much and don’t feel the need to work towards using them. The worst communication experience that I have experienced in life so far was when I was in a relationship with my ex-fiancé. Trying to engage in a conversation with him was like pulling teeth.
When he was home, he was still preoccupied. He rarely made eye contact and was an extremely passive person. When it came to discussing pressing matters, he would shut down and avert conflict. Unfortunately, this caused a lot of tension in our relationship, as I felt he did not care about these matters. The less he communicated with me, the angrier I got. My assertiveness eventually turned into aggression, and with that aggression came more avoidance from him. It was a continuous cycle of nothingness. The best communication experience in my life thus far has been with my therapist. For the first time in my life, I felt that I could truly be open and honest without being judged. She and I conduct amazing conversations about life, as well as my goals and aspirations. I feel everything I gain from our conversations is a lot of what was missing in my relationship. I required someone to confide in, and with my therapist, I ultimately discovered that person. I can see that communication is much more than just the transmission of information. The exchange of messages and information helps us achieve certain physical and instrumental needs, but it also feeds into our identities and relationships in ways that far exceed the content of what we say. Human beings are social creatures, which makes communication important for our survival. I have learned that when communicating with others who have effective interpersonal communication skills, I have been more capable to adapt to stress and have had decreased amounts of depression and anxiety. When I think about someone who is an excellent communicator, my formers pastor comes to mind.
First and foremost, I admire his listening skills. He’s effective at focusing on understanding others’ messages. He watches for verbal and non-verbal cues to interpret messages accurately. He also avoids interrupting, talking over, of completing the sentences of others. As a preacher on during church services, he also demonstrated he knew his audience. He was able to adapt his language and style according to the people he was preaching to. I also admire his confidence. While he did show his vulnerable side in certain situations, he displayed confidence by maintaining eye contact and speaking clearly at a suitable volume. As for myself, I would like to improve on my listening skills. While I do try to actively listen, my mind wanders a lot. I am sure people are aware when I start to drift away, which is not how I want to be seen. Sometimes people that I converse with are so long-winded, mind-wandering is all I can do. Listening to long, drawn-out conversation exhausts me if the speaker is not getting to the point. I need to establish better patience and understanding and polish up on my active listening skills.
There were several topics covered in this course that stand out to me as most important. Chapters 12-15 were extremely beneficial. Many times in our lives, we are faced with the challenge of working with teams. Team collaboration has so many benefits, but unfortunately, not all team members have strong communication skills. Learning how to communicate effectively as part of a team, demonstrating leadership through communication, and handling conflict at work are all fundamentally significant concepts. The assignments that went along with these chapters allowed me to analyze my past work experiences, while also getting a better idea of what kind of work culture I want to be part of in the future. These are all topics that I would like to see myself grow in, as well.