Analysis Of My Relationship With My Mother Using Mark Knapp’S Stage Development Theory
In Bible, Genesis 2:18, God said that it is not good for a man to be alone and after which he created a woman and said that they should be together. There are many kinds of relationship like the one that you share with your friend, one with your significant other, one with someone in your family. Communication in any kind of relationship is important. Relationships will come and go in your life, but there are some relationships that you share with your friends and family will definitely leave a mark in your life. I would like talk about relationship that I share with my mother.
My mother and I share a good relationship. We have had our moments where we have been annoyed with another, and who has not experienced that with their relationship, but we have always moved past from our differences and have understood each other’s point of view. I would be using Mark Knapp’s stage development to show how my relationship with my mother has progressed and how at times it has been difficult.
She has been someone with whom I have shared all of my worries with. But from time to time we have had our differences and some disagreements on something, but it always has resolved afterwards. I can think of one time when we started to differentiate. It happened when I was still in high school. I had to go to swimming classes, and although, I loved swimming I did not want to go those classes. I did not tell my mother that I did not want to go, instead I would just roam around in the neighborhood close to the swimming center. One day she saw me, and she went directly to the classes and inquired if I had been coming to the classes or not. She came to knew that I was not coming to the classes, after which she just stopped talking to me, and we entered differentiation phase. In differentiation phase, “relationship starts to fade away and the bond between two people may get broken”.
After she stopped talking to me, she started to avoid me completely, and we then entered into avoidance phase. Before she would at least look at me, and then she started to avoid me completely. I had apologized to her multiple times, but did not work, and then my father came in to resolve the situation. To resolve the issue I had to give her a promise that from now on I would tell her everything. After apologizing to her and my father, my mother started to talk to me again. Once she started to talk to me again, I felt as if a huge boulder had been lifted off of my back, and we had started to talk and bond again. The Human Communication book defines interpersonal conflict as “the expression of two interdependent parties regarding perceived incompatibilities”.
In my case, my mother was mad because she thought I wasted money and I had been irresponsible by not telling anyone about it. My mother then stopped talking to me because she thought I was not responsible in life and I was careless, and until I resolved those issues, she would not talk to me. I had tried to negotiate with her, but she did not budge until my father came in and negotiated on my behalf. I feel every relationship goes through some kind of conflict, but it is up to people in the relationship to take an initiative to attempt to solve the conflict, instead of doing nothing, and making situation worse. After everything happened, I perceived that I deserved that punishment from her and from that moment I have a commitment to tell my mother everything and be frank with her. I believe this conflict helped us come closer to one another, and it helped in improving our relationship and maid our bond stronger.
