The Impact Of Kin On Identity Formation
We’re all labeled differently. Where we originate from, what we have done, what we endeavor to do, and a million other apparently relevant part of our lives consolidate to make our identity. Our identities are continually being formed and molded with each passing day. The way in which I characterize myself has changed various occasions throughout the years. I have done many things and played many roles throughout my life, yet before these, before I came to be the individual I am today, I am the youngest. Being the youngest will dependably lie at the focal point of who I genuinely am It is the establishment from which my identity was constructed. Kin is the most grounded impact a tyke can have.
It's hard to grow up as a young child in a family. Many people think it's all rainbows and unicorns for the youngest child; they're supposed to get whatever they want and get away with everything. Although it was a distinctive experience, it was also difficult to deal with. This was the case for me, my life, being the youngest, was different from anyone else I grew up knowing and the only ones I could empathize with being the young child were my older siblings, but none of them knew how much the youngest actually felt.
As the youngest, I had to beg to get my brother to play with me. Even when he did, it was just for a few minutes then he left because it was “too boring. ” He would constantly say things like: “I don’t want to play with you, you’re just a little kid”, “that’s stuff babies do, go play by yourself” and even “you get your way all the time, run have mommy play with you. ” I wasn’t too far behind my sibling of age. He’s four years older than I am, that didn’t make him want to play with me, though. Even by our age gap, people expect me to act like him. It was often hard for me to take… didn’t these people know I was my own person? Weren’t they aware that I wasn’t just a mini-me of my brother? I have my own thoughts and ideas too! I'm certain they knew this… but they didn’t really care. It quickly became clear to me that people didn’t see me as an individual. Growing up being the youngest in the family was hard. I could handle being the youngest, but having a huge spotlight placed on you because of the sibling competitions was completely different and difficult to handle… but I slowly found out it wasn’t impossible. My brother and I had different stories and different experience, but one thing we knew we’d always have was each other. Yes, to this day I’m the youngest child to my parents and I always will be. It was a difficult period of my life, but it taught me so many things that help me out even today and most importantly it was able to make me close with my brother.
It’s commonly believed that youngest child is the child that has it the easiest among the parents. The parent puts every one of the obligations and expectations of the oldest; the middle child is forgotten, and the youngest gets all the affection and consideration of the parents. The youngest is the best, can do whatever without getting in trouble. I am the youngest child in my family, and this is far from the truth. I have always lived in a competition with my older brother Kenneth who is four years older than me.
My earliest memory of our competitions was in karate. My brother was in karate five years prior I joined, my mom assumed me joining will create some bonding time but it only stirred up the competition. My brother was 14 at the time while I was 10. He was a second-degree black belt and the headmaster’s favorite. When I originally began class, the air was not the same as home. At home, my mom adored us similarly, but in the martial arts center, the favoritism air was suffocating me. “Welcome, Kenneth!” “Kenneth can you help with the kids” “Nice shoes Kenneth!” “Kenneth lets hang out after!” The kids in wonderment of him at whatever point he strolled in. He was on the private delta group, 8 chosen individuals from the headmaster himself. In any case, for me, I was continually battling with my roundhouse kick, hook kick, board breaking and numerous more things that Kenneth exceeded expectations at. I only got up to orange belt and I was there for three years. Evident of my lethargy. I was drained from the constant comparison of us. This was the start of our constant game of catch-up, him in the lead as always. The sense of competition is why it has been so hard being the youngest child. My brother has done as such numerous things in his 20 years on the planet, and I feel as though I need to coordinate, if not beat him.
Despite many of the minor inconveniences of being the youngest, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I've gained from my sibling's missteps and from my own. Being the youngest accompanies numerous advantages. During my time of managing the prodding and teasing, it's molded me into the individual I am today. I work towards becoming a mature citizen that is not afraid of competition, as it will only create a path of growth for me.
