Divorce In Muslim Society
Introduction
Termination of beautiful marital bond due to lack of something, which can be trust or any other purpose is called as Divorce or ‘talaq’. It is the annulment of the legal responsibilities, and considered very awkward in Muslim Society.
The divorce rules and regulations are under the control of ‘Sharia’, as transcribed by accepted Islamic law. Divorce practice in the Islamic world varied according to place and time.
Marriage in Islam is considered as the pure bonding of two people into single soul but due to different reasons it can spoil this bonding created under light of Islam and this can be done by pronouncing (the Arabic word ‘TALAQ’ for divorce) three times.
There are basically three types of divorce in Islam which are:
- Talaaqur Raj’ee
- Talaaqul Baa’in
- Talaaqul Mughallazah
· Talaaqur Raj’ee (revocable divorce):
It is that type of divorce where the husband divorces his wife in strong and clear terms. e.g. Once the husband says such words, the wife becomes divorced and she has to sit in Iddah (waiting period) of three months and if she is pregnant. The husband now has the choice of annulling his divorce before the termination of the Iddah. The husband may revoke his divorce by orally uttering his desire to take her back into his Nikaah.
· Talaaqul Baa’in (irrevocable divorce):
Talaaqul Baa’in is an irreversible divorce where the husband uses unclear or ambiguous words to divorce his wife. For example, the husband says to his wife Pack your bags and get out of here, you are no more my wife or Go to your father’s house. Once the husband has delivered one or two Talaaqul Baa’in, the Nikah has been fragmented and she has to sit in Iddah. If the husband wishes to take back his wife, a new Nikah have to be performed.
· Talaaqul Mughallazah (permanently irreversible divorce):
It is happened when the husband subjects three divorces to his wife. Once the husband subjects his wife with three divorces (Talaaqur Raj’ee or Talaaqul Baa’in), their Nikah is completely broken. She cannot marry him until Halaalah has taken place It is a process wherein the wife completes her Iddah, thereafter she marries another man and concludes her marriage with him. The second husband gives her divorce or he may pass away. She again has to do Iddah from this second marriage. After this, she may marry her first husband.
Quran and Sunnah consider this breakup of lawful relationship as bad practice, it can be done by either the behavior of Husband as well as Wife and sometimes both. There are conditions for divorce it is not the simple process, Islam have laid down some responsibilities and rights for men and women.
Day by day this act is increasing due to many factors which mainly includes misuse of freedom between couples, more than one marriage, extra marital affairs and many other issues.
Discussions and Findings
Shariah is the collection of Islamic Laws which governs in principle of the action of any individual or Muslim community. These rules are derived from the Qur’an and Sunnah - the practice of Islamic laws by the Prophet Muhammad PBUH. There are the set of rules governing the link between Allah and any Individual in terms of religious practices are non-negotiable where the body of rules which governs all corporate relations which include political, social, economic are opened to evaluate according to certain criteria. These all criteria, derived from the Qur’an and Sunnah. One of the core criteria is marriage, in which one man and women are bound according to rules set in Islam and whenever there is any bad turn in life of that couple.
Islam stands for divorce of a husband and wife under certain conditions however, Islam regards divorce as repulsive and disgraceful. Imam Jaffer Sadiq (A.S) has declared:
“Truely, Allah loves a house in which a wedding is held and hates a house in which a divorce is conducted and there is nothing more hateful than divorce.”
Islam holds divorce as an extremely ugly and vile act, which must be avoided within the limits of opportunity. In order to stop divorces, Islam campaigns against its causes, some of which are enumerated below:
One powerful factor for divorce is the discouragement of a husband for his sincere wife and his affection towards Non-Mehrum women. The chief instrument for this is lack of acceptable Hijab (Cover) among women and staring at men. When a man looks any woman, who is more beautiful and attractive than legitimate wife he may become lovesick with her and become discouraged with his wife. Slowly he makes his married life unpleasant by finding faults, seeking excuses, and picking quarrels, which lead to divorces. On the one hand, Islam orders women to perceive Hijab, cover their magnetisms from men, and refrain from being attractive for anyone but only their own husbands.
To stop this, Islam teaches women to wear their best clothes when at home, make themselves up according to their husbands’ wishes, and display themselves with passionate dedication. Moreover, Islam charges men to witness personal cleanliness, style themselves, and show a good-looking and warm manner for their wives.
Islam's lays down that: 'Divorce is in the hand of the man.' And it is in reflection of the woman's weakness of spirit that the power of ending a shared life is not granted to her. Islam, in addition to the multiple events it has taken to make it easier for people to enter the married state and start families, also makes it more difficult to break up this Islamic pact.
It is therefore that it is written in Surah Nisa'a —'The Women' verse 19:
'O men, live with your wives in kindness and equity. If you dislike anything in them, that may be the very point which God will use to bring about much blessing.'
In order avoid such feelings of hatred and prevent their turning to hate, and to remove their distress, Islam awakens the man's morality to live in kindness and equity with patience, and not to cast off a wife who is temporarily in disrepute, since it may be that goodness and blessing may come through those very wives, so it would be stupid to end the relationship rapidly.
Islam hurdles in the man's authority of divorce with many restrictive precautions. A man may not leave his wife by harassment, injury, violence or in a way which may lead her to a life of dissolution and dishonesty. Thus, Islam has times exceeded anything yet realized in Western countries, in its creativity to remove alterations and reinstate understanding in family life.
There is a question raised in minds that if divorce is truly hated by Islam, why has it not banned it? Basically, how is the union of legality and detestability possible? Why has Islam permitted divorce what is the reason behind it?
To answer above questions here are some reasons:
Even if divorce is hateful and ugly, occasionally it is a need that cannot be avoided. For example, surgical removal of parts of the body is painful and repulsive but it is vital in some positive conditions and for the benefit of humans for example: As when a person has cancer. If lasting the marriage is torturous for the husband and wife and the problem cannot be solved in any other way, divorce may be the best solution.
In some cases, a woman must approach the team of mediators and ask them to guide and council her husband and persuade him to perceive fairness and justice, and to perform his responsibilities. If they are successful, she endures her life with him and if he does not see the light and modify his ways, she must advance her issue to an official Islamic judge or family court.
The judge orders the wrong husband and demands that he refrain from cruelty and abuse and that he performs his duties. If he does not accept, he is indebted to divorce her. If he ignores to do so, the judge himself divorces them and compellingly takes the wife’s rights from her husband.
Obviously, if two people both have the right to associative divorce proceedings, the basis of assurance is made wobbly for both parties. What appropriate protection can there be, therefore, than to give the right of divorce proceedings principally to the one who has by nature more domination to the powers of reason, and tolerance in the face of lack of sensitivity and who stands to miss the amount he has given as a marriage share, as well as having to undertake the financial loads of the children's upbringing?
Also, in Allah in Quran said:
“Two just persons from amongst yourselves shall bear witness to the evidence before God when a divorce is settled”. – Surah At-Talaq [Qur'an 65:2]
It is clearly stated in Quran that Without these two eyewitnesses, there is no legal divorce. An advantage of their nomination is that they can exercise every gravity of fondness and understanding to prevent the final calamity for relatively a period before reluctantly, if they have to do so, approving that there is no other way out. They recurrently flourished in the better course.
Conclusions and Recommendations
The fundamentals of family are grounded on these two values and if each part of a couple achieves their internal desires the foundation of family becomes deep, pleasant, and lovely. Men are inspired by their family and work hard to secure the ease and happiness of the family. Women consider themselves joyful and successful and effort thoroughly in taking good care of their husbands, children, and home.
If a husband does not have fondness towards his wife (or vice versa) and hates seeing and relating with her, and if the wife feels that she has collapsed from her position of beloved and that her husband does not like her, the family has lost two of its key pillars and is considered ruined. Living in such an emotionless and broken family is demanding and painful for both women and men.
There are many situations on which couple have to select the option of divorce but our first priority must be revival of that critical situation as Divorce is not considered good in our Islam and Society. In light of Quran and by practical practices done by Prophet Muhammad S.A.W teach us to live marriage life with patience, both husband and wife should tolerate each other’s behavior as there are many ups and downs in their marriage life but they have to settle their issues patiently and ignore small problems. Marriage life is complete with children and they seek the love of their parents but when parent tries to take this step, they should also take account of their children as they would face bad impact on future. As we have discussed, most prominent issue is Hijab as Muslim in modern society are also fashioning themselves modern and they wear exposed dresses which is the major reason of men’s attraction towards other women and giving less priority to their wives. If they wear proper covered and our traditional dresses then this ratio of divorce can be decrease.
Children are everything to their parents so especially men have to stop themselves from breaking up their relationships due to small mistakes of women and treat their wives wisely. We should adopt our lifestyles according to Islam so when we walk on the path of Islam, we stay firm and avoid these happiness losses.
Both men and women should have trust on themselves and both have to maintain that trust in order to make their life happy, if there exist any doubt then both should sit and resolve them if there is big issue then there is the role of their elders to resolve that issue.
We are Muslims and we have to follow instructions of Allah and Prophet Muhammad S.A.W in order to succeed and live happy life.
