People Who Don’t Hide Their Tears Are Stronger

All emotions are not equal nor find the same degree of acceptance in our society. The most accepted emotion is happiness, basically because it is a sign of security, confidence and success. That is why we are forced to feign happiness, we respond that we are well and we smile, even if inside we are broken. Since happiness assures us social success, it makes us win friends and conveys an image of success.

Sadness, however, is cataloged as a negative emotion, an emotion that must be hidden and that we should even be ashamed of. Expressions of sadness, with slumped shoulders, sad eyes and crying, are considered signs of weakness and insecurity. A society that always demands that we be happy and happy, willing to eat the world, is simply tremendously unfair. Because we don't work that way, we often get sad. Stigmatizing sadness only serves to make us feel worse, so that we think we are not strong enough to endure our problems without falling apart. However, in reality people who dare to express their sadness and cry have a greater emotional balance than those who suppress their tears and hide their feelings. An Irish proverb says, 'Shed tears are bitter, but bitter tears are not shed.'

Why Are Crying People More Emotionally Balanced

• Don't repress your emotions

If you feel elated with joy, would you hide your smile? If you hear a loud sound in the house at night, wouldn't it scare you? So there is no reason to hide the sadness. Only self-assured people with great Emotional Intelligence can recognize and express their emotions, even if they are considered “negative”. It takes a lot of courage to swim against the current and express who you really are or how you feel right now. In fact, the philosopher Seneca stated that 'There is no greater cause to weep than not to weep.'

Keeping a cool mind and repressing emotions comes at a great cost, not only to our psychological as well as physical health. Numerous studies have linked emotional repression with a higher risk of developing diseases such as asthma, hypertension and heart disease. Interestingly, a study at Standord University found that people who often suppress their emotions act exaggeratedly under pressure and stress, with a greater increase in blood pressure than people cataloged as anxious. This tells us that this “apparent calm” is not really good for our emotional balance.

• Take advantage of tears to change perspective

Did you know that tears relieve stress, anxiety, pain and frustration? Tears are not only the water that cleanses the soul but also cleanses our eyes to allow us to see the situation from another perspective. Tears strengthen us and allow us to grow. As Uruguayan poet Sara de Ibáñez said: “I am going to cry without haste. I'll cry until I forget the cry and reach the smile.” In fact, 70% of people think crying is comforting. And that crying allows us to see the situation from a more positive perspective. When we are done crying, our minds become clearer and in a few minutes we will be able to analyze the situation from another perspective. This is because our emotions have balanced and our rational mind is prepared to take action.

• Know that crying is therapeutic

Did you know that crying stimulates the release of endorphins in our brain, which help us relieve pain and also foster a state of relaxation and peace? That's why after crying, we feel so much better and relaxed. In fact, it has been found that it is not convenient to cut the crying but let it flow because the first phase has only an activating effect but the second phase has a calming effect that reduces heart rate and breathing, providing a state of relaxation. Sometimes crying is more beneficial than laughter. A study at the University of Florida found that crying is profoundly therapeutic, especially when coupled with a 'relational remedy,' that is, when approaching other people gives them comfort. They also realized that sad crying, the one that is destined to create new bonds after a loss, has a cathartic power.

• Do not submit to social expectations

People who are not afraid of crying feel much freer, are able to express themselves unhurried by social conventionalisms. These people are not afraid to disappoint others or show their supposed “weakness” because they know that crying does not imply any of this. People who cry are truer and do not want to be made up by social expectations. This awareness leads them to be freer and to lead a life by their own rules. These people are true 'activists' who fight for a healthier, emotionally-minded society where people are not forced to hide their feelings.

• Connect emotionally through tears

Crying is one of the most intimate expressions of our feelings. When we cry in front of someone, it is as if we are stripping our soul. So tears help create a very special connection, it's like connecting directly through our deepest self. When another person 'accepts' this sadness, without trying to escape from it or to offer us false words of encouragement, simply supports us and stands by us, a unique connection is created. Indeed, one of the functions of tears is precisely that of asking for help, even if it is indirectly, showing our helplessness, so that the others may come and comfort us. Therefore, crying and sadness should not be perceived as a sign of weakness, but as a sign of inner fortitude and mindfulness. We do not cry because we are weak or incapable, but because we are alive and not ashamed to express what we feel.

Therefore, as the Argentine poet Oliverio Girondo said:

'Cry the living tear, cry the cry ... ..Cry it all, but cry it well. (...) Cry love, tiredness and joy.'