Toxic Masculinity's Effect on Men, Women and the Whole Society

To be clear in the beginning of toxic masculinity essay: ‘toxic masculinity’ is not an innate male trait, but rather the result of societal expectations of what it means to be a man. The truth is, traditional gender roles can be constrictive for boys as well as girls: toxic masculinity limits the emotions which are acceptable for men to show and puts pressure on men to constantly push for dominance. Historically, men have been expected to fight and die in wars – does this imply we value male life less? Boys are often told to ‘man up’, implying they should show less emotion or more aggression. Another common phrase is ‘boys will be boys’ which, when used as a response to boys fighting, normalises and promotes violence as a masculine trait, so boys grow up in a world defined by manly winners and unmanly losers.

Toxics Masculinity’s Effect on Men

My brother, who is a 23-year-old training to be a doctor, opened up to me in an interview. He talked about the fact that growing up, it was always heavily implied that for him, showing emotion would be a sign of weakness. He felt that in order to be accepted by his peer group, he had to suppress the softer side of him and be one of the ‘hard’, ‘macho’ lads that degraded women in their free time, punched each other for fun and never cried. He never had an outlet for his emotions which built up and turned into frustration and aggression. Many others feel it is necessary to suppress their feelings and are reluctant to seek help for their mental health. Men are three times more likely to commit suicide than women; many people relate this to toxic masculinity.

Toxic Masculinity’s Effect on Women

Toxic masculinity is often the cause of wolf-whistling and catcalling on the streets, and it can also incite violence among men, encouraging rape culture. Feeling threatened by men has created a lot of anti-men feminists, which in turn makes men less sympathetic towards feminism. We need to know that feminism isn’t women being superior to men but the fact that we are all equal! Additionally, combating toxic masculinity is a case of breaking traditional gender roles, which is something feminists have been working towards for years.

Toxic Masculinity’s Effect on Society

It institutionalises chauvinistic principles - this means that it establishes a custom of men believing they are superior to women. This has caused many issues that the feminist movement has been fighting against, for example, workplace discrimination. Another issue it raises is healthcare: with men only seeking medical advice as a last resort, the NHS is put under more pressure. Again, some men see seeking help as a sign of weakness.

Over time it is becoming the norm for men to be softer and more open to showing emotion, but this is a slow process. Men have to ask themselves, ‘What type of man do I want to be?’. Women need to understand that they can also reinforce toxic masculinity accidentally, just by using phrases like ‘toughen up’ and putting traditional expectations on men, and that this is an own goal that undermines the feminist cause. There are great sources out there to help you self-educate on this topic – I loved Tony Porter’s Ted Talk, ‘A Call to Men’. Boys, it’s ok not to be ok.

Conclsuion: Food for Thought

“Suppose we told girls that society measures a woman’s worth by her ability to financially support a man. Suppose after making this clear, we faulted successful women for out earning the men they have been told to support. Suppose we then decided this was evidence that women were oppressing men. Suppose we made fun of women who raised these issues and suppose that we looked at how our expectations make women act, aggressive, competitive and stoic, and labeled this result ‘toxic femininity'.